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Jokes and Funny Stuff Thread


Chaztin
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Crazy people on my WhatsApp list.

 

1. Someone on his status "Sleeping"

...since 3 days!

He's probably dead.

 

2. Someone never sends anything, then at night once a week/month he says: "Good night"

WTF!

 

3. Someone is sick since the time I added him.

 

4. Someone steals my status and keeps it at the same time when I do.

 

5. Someone is "Driving"

...since 3 days!

I guess he reached Pakistan!!

 

6. Someone sends me back exactly what I sent to him..

Seems like he wants to play table tennis!

 

7. Someone still has his status as "Happy New Year!"

 

8. Someone's status is "Happy" since one month.

Living in Paradise?

 

9. Someone when I send a broadcast he just puts a smiley face.

 

10. From first day their status is, 'Hey there! I'm using WhatsApp'

I know it! That's why you're on my list!

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my cousin wrote this: :rofl:

 

Now that I’m learning marketing, understanding market trends and predicting future market is an important part of my day. After some analysis I’m trying to figure out the trends and future of facebook users

1. 2004 – 2007: facebook users want to keep in touch with their close ones. As international calls were expensive

2. 2007 – 2010: the trend changed. Users wanted as many friends possible on facebook. The one with the most friends is the winner. Users would spend hours to find the people they know so they can send a friend request. So we had facebook apps for mobile phones, and hence instead of adding them later it could be done right away, instead of having a good time with the people around us.

3. 2010 – 2014: now people have become smart. It is not about quantity it is about quality. So they want more likes, comments, basically more reaction from the crowd. So they would add photos, upload anything, what they are doing, where they were an ho

ur ago, and everything to get a reaction. The next generation cameras let you upload pictures right away on facebook, better facebook apps on smart phones.

4. 2014 – 2017: now that parents, uncles, aunts, close relatives all have joined facebook. The younger generation would slowly move out. And Mr. Zuckerberg would create another networking websites according to your age group.

5. 2017 – 2020: already users have started updating (typing) their status while cooking, eating, in the bathroom, etc. Mr zuckerberg will introduce technology to update status. A huge chunk of mobile users use smartphones. So instead of typing you just update your status by telling “facebook Siri 9.0”. Hands not required. You can also listen to the status changed by the person you are stalking online.

6. 2020 – 2022: the number of users on facebook reaches 10 billion even though the total population is 8 something billion. People by then realise there is an issue with privacy. And advertisers on facebook have already f**ked with our heads. The downfall of facebook starts. NASDAQ reaches an all-time low because of facebook. The next generation kids are even dumber because they use the following words every day – lol, lmao, omg, wtf, etc...

7. 2022 - : if you still on facebook please go get a life. There are so many like you who want to have real friends and not online friends.

I guess I updated my status because I am following the trend. :)

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Nakaam Aashiq ki shayari:

 

Yu humko satane ki zarurat kya thi?

Gand meri jalane ki zarurat kya thi?

 

Jo nahi tha Ishq to keh dia hota,

Apni Maa Chudane ki zarurat kya thi?

 

Maloom tha agar ye khwab toot jayega,

Neend me aakar Chudwane ki zarurat kya thi?

 

Maan lu agar ye ektarfa Mohabbat thi,

Maa ki Lodi,Mujhe Dekh k Muskurane ki zarurat kya thi!!!....

 

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