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44 minutes ago, Bird Bird Bird said:

 

 

 

Why people's desires to marry within their own clans is frowned upon?


I mean this is how it has always been, for religions, sects, Kabeelas, races....

 

As we advanced, it became more of an individual choice and social "expectation".

And once society becomes more individualistic, expectation will come down further.

 

 

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27 minutes ago, Right said:

Why people's desires to marry within their own clans is frowned upon?

 

First, way to miss they point. 

 

Second, most "caste based" marriages are not based on desire, but on compulsion, by parents and relatives. Ladka kitna bhi ch u tiya ho, ladki gori chahiye !

 

As you said, the individual matters, not the caste, creed or religion. Do you fall in love with an individual's personality etc or their caste ? Why would you even start your "search" based on caste ?

 

There's nothing wrong if you want to consciously marry within your caste, but I know you know that that's not really the case. It's used to weed out "ajoot or choti jaati". f**k caste system. 

 

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1 hour ago, Bird Bird Bird said:

As you said, the individual matters, not the caste, creed or religion. Do you fall in love with an individual's personality etc or their caste ? Why would you even start your "search" based on caste

 

The marriage is a social construct to begin with, it is built around making two persons that the society has decided, mate.

 

Of course, now that it has become more of an individual choice, one has independence to engage with person of their choice, and choice can be driven via any factor, including caste.

 

Individual choices shouldn't be judged.

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10 minutes ago, Right said:

Individual choices shouldn't be judged.

 

Exactly. How many individual actively look for partners based on caste ?

You're comparing the caste system with choice. There's no choice here. 

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17 minutes ago, Bird Bird Bird said:

 

Exactly. How many individual actively look for partners based on caste ?

You're comparing the caste system with choice. There's no choice here. 

 

Obviously, there are people who are looking for partners based on caste, thus exist the apps and websites which are catering to such people.

Bharat Matrimony, one of the oldest ones on the block had regional sites, like Bengali, Tamil....

But they gave provisions to search matches with supplied caste/subcastes too.

 

Would it be wrong for a person with fair complexion to search for a partner with fair complexion, it is not.

But even if you think it is wrong, why should you interfere into his life, judge his choices?

 

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3 minutes ago, Right said:

 

Obviously, there are people who are looking for partners based on caste, thus exist the apps and websites which are catering to such people.

Bharat Matrimony, one of the oldest ones on the block had regional sites, like Bengali, Tamil....

But they gave provisions to search matches with supplied caste/subcastes too.

 

Would it be wrong for a person with fair complexion to search for a partner with fair complexion, it is not.

But even if you think it is wrong, why should you interfere into his life, judge his choices?

 

 

You really think someone is uploading a photo of self on a caste based matrimony site and searching for a soul mate ? Come on man. Idealism aside, all this sh*t is done by parents and family members. You know it, I know it. 

You can form all your idealistic answers, but at the core, it exists because some Brahmin mom does not want their son to be married to an SC ST. 

I've gone through this sh*t IRL, and this f**king forced caste system needs to die. 

You want to belong to a tribe ? Do it willingly, not by birth. 

Imagine if a pilot says I won't fly lower caste people, or a surgeon says he won't operate on Brahmins. 

Caste, religion and politics - the trifecta exists to only create divide. Shittiest stuff humankind has ever created. 

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7 minutes ago, Bird Bird Bird said:

 

You really think someone is uploading a photo of self on a caste based matrimony site and searching for a soul mate ? Come on man. Idealism aside, all this sh*t is done by parents and family members. You know it, I know it. 

 

No, I know for sure that people do search for partners with their own parameters, which includes caste as well.

One of the ex-collegue searched on FB for girls who share his last name, found one whom he eventually got married with. This was 2014.

A friend, searched a match on Kannada matrimony for the caste he belongs to, he is happily married with his soulmate for 14 yrs now.

 

Quote

You can form all your idealistic answers, but at the core, it exists because some Brahmin mom does not want their son to be married to an SC ST. 

I've gone through this sh*t IRL, and this f**king forced caste system needs to die. 

You want to belong to a tribe ? Do it willingly, not by birth. 

 

The system "exists" for donkey years, it is not being created, people are being participants only.

If you dont want to participate, you are free to make your choices.

 

 

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Imagine if a pilot says I won't fly lower caste people, or a surgeon says he won't operate on Brahmins. 

 

That will be bigotry. And its apples to oranges comparison.

 

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Caste, religion and politics - the trifecta exists to only create divide. Shittiest stuff humankind has ever created. 

 

I totally agree. 

 

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