Jokes and Funny Stuff Thread

[Sackboy]

mo reps for mee

[Madhav]

NSFW!!

 

 

[LagWarriorZergey]

Guess I Shud Tag It NSFW

 

 

Edited December 7, 2010 by zergey

[in-fi-ni-ty]

Newton: How to rite 4 in btwn 5?

China: Joke

Japan: Impossible

America: wrongQ

pak: if u ask foolish Qz, il kil u

From India

 

Rajnikant: F(IV)E

 

Edited December 7, 2010 by in-fi-ni-ty

[ayush12ice]

http://www.bullshittor.com/?corporate

[Solitaire]

Hahaha corporate bullshit generator

[Solitaire]

Recently scientists revealed that beer contains small traces of female hormones.

 

To prove their theory, the scientists fed 100 men twelve bottles of beer each. The scientists observed that 100% of the male test group gained weight, talked excessively without making sense, became emotional, and couldn't drive.

 

No further testing is planned.

[indusporus]

[abhi90]

[Bird Bird Bird]

[Nemo]

GLOL !! awesome man indusporus

[Solitaire]

Droid Fragmentation.. literally

 

http://www.pcmag.com/article2/0,2817,2373881,00.asp

[Mozart]

Lawyers should never ask grandmas a question if they aren’t prepared for the answer!

 

In a trial, a small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness,

an elderly grandmother to the stand. He approached her and asked;

"Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"

 

She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a young boy, and frankly, you're a big disappointment to me.. You lie, cheat on your wife, manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.."

 

The lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney (the opponent's lawyer)?"

 

She again replied, "Why, yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster. He's lazy, bigoted, and has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. ..Yes I know him."

 

The defense attorney almost died.

 

The judge asked both lawyers to approach the bench and in a quiet voice

said: "If either of you rascals asks her if she knows me, I'll send you to jail for contempt of court !!!

[Bird Bird Bird]

[Mozart]

Love Story of Engineer:

 

I was in 12th………

She was in 12th……………

 

I got BE………..

She got Bsc………….

 

I was doing BE………..

She got MSc……………..

 

I was doing BE………….

She got PhD………….

 

I Completed BE……….

She got a Doctrate…………..

 

She got Married…………..

I was preparing for ME enterance……………….

 

She is the mother of 2 children………………

I am doing my ME………………….

 

 

Her daughter is in 1st std,…………………

I completed ME………..

 

Her daughter passed 10th…………………

I joined a software company……………..

 

THE GREATEST IRONY:

 

Today is my engagement………..

And..

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

 

Her DAUGHTER IS MY WIFE……………

 

 

Agle janam mohe commerce hi deejo…………………(Give Commerce in next life)

[Solitaire]

That's wholly inaccurate....

 

The original, however, wasn't. It was BE or BSc vs MBBS.. That was accurate. This timeline is just nonsense unless you do a 7-8 year BE with a thousand arrears .

[pArth]

@ gamefreak

 

it would be apt for mbbs though as gaurav said

Edited December 8, 2010 by pArth

[Bird Bird Bird]

it would be apt for mbbs though as gaurav said

True

[Solitaire]

True

 

 

There there....

 

 

 

Besides you get to serve the people and all that... we only serve ourselves and make money early and stuff I'm so devastated by that fact you know

 

j/k

 

 

Btw did anyone catch that droid fragmentation link?

Edited December 8, 2010 by Gaurav - Solitaire

[Mozart]

I agree

 

with NFT rule now on BE , cant go for 7-8 years