Sufyan Posted January 25, 2011 Report Share Posted January 25, 2011 A man sat down at a bar and told the bartender, "I bet you three hundred dollars that I can piss into the cup all the way over there on the other side of the bar and not miss a single drop." The bartender said, "There is no way you can do that. Sure, I'll bet you three hundred dollars." The man then begins to undo his pants and begins pissing. He starts pissing all over the bar, spraying on the bottles and the bartender, not making a single drop in the cup. The bartender starts smiling and laughing and says, "That's it, you owe me three hundred dollars." The man then gets up and walks over to the pool table and starts laughing and shaking hands with the men standing there. He walks back to bar, sits down and starts laughing at the bartender and hands him the money. The bartender asks, "Why are you laughing? You just lost the bet." The man said, "I'm laughing because I bet those guys over there one thousand dollars that I could piss all over you and your bar and you would still be laughing when I was done." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Solitaire Posted January 26, 2011 Report Share Posted January 26, 2011 no limit to MSN INdia's stupidity. Saw this early in the morning when I logged in and caught a quick screen cap. They've changed it to the regular blue background now. Independence day.. yeah right Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheHitman Posted January 26, 2011 Report Share Posted January 26, 2011 I just saw it as well, i think they mean happy independence day from your mobile operator.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Solitaire Posted January 26, 2011 Report Share Posted January 26, 2011 (edited) I just saw it as well, i think they mean happy independence day from your mobile operator.... It does, now I noticed it comes up only when the docomo ad is there, but it would be more apt as an Independence day message . Here it just stands out as blatantly trying to commercialize republic day via advertising. Edited January 26, 2011 by Gaurav - Solitaire Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LagWarriorZergey Posted January 26, 2011 Report Share Posted January 26, 2011 Loool Got answer to everything lmao!! 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LagWarriorZergey Posted January 26, 2011 Report Share Posted January 26, 2011 Coudlnt help it.. Broke few ribs laughin my a*s off damn!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Madhav Posted January 26, 2011 Report Share Posted January 26, 2011 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
killzone123 Posted January 26, 2011 Report Share Posted January 26, 2011 Working people frequently ask retired people what they do to make their days interesting. Well, for example, the other day my wife and I went into town and went into a shop. We were only in there for about 5 minutes. When we came out, there was a cop writing out a parking ticket. We went up to him and said, "Come on man, how about giving a senior citizen a break?" He ignored us and continued writing the ticket. I called him a Nazi turd. He glared at me and started Writing another ticket for having worn tires. So my wife called him a ****-head. He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first. Then he started writing a third ticket. This went on for about 20 minutes. The more we abused him, the more tickets he wrote. Personally, we didn't care. We came into town by bus. ------------- rich man and a poor man were sitting at a bar having a few drinks and they got chatting. after a while they realise both of there wedding anniverserys are the next day. Poor man, "What did you get your wife for her wedding anniversery?" Rich man, "I got her a pink ferrari and a diamond ring." Poor man, "What made you choose those gifts?" Rich man, "She loves fast cars and I wasnt sure about the ring so if she doesnt like it, she can take it back in her new car... " The poor, "Man nodds in agreement." Rich man, "What did you get your wife?" Poor man, "I got my wife a pair of cheap slippers and a dildo." Rich man, "Why did you choose those gifts?" Poor man, " Well if she doesnt like the slippers she can go f*uck herself." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pushy Posted January 26, 2011 Report Share Posted January 26, 2011 Three kids come down to the kitchen and sit around the breakfast table. The mother asks the oldest boy what he’d like to eat. "I’ll have some f**ckin’ French toast," he says. The mother is outraged at his language, hits him, and sends him upstairs. She asks the middle child what he wants. "Well, I guess that leaves more f**ckin’ French toast for me," he says. She is livid, smacks him, and sends him away. Finally she asks the youngest son what he wants for breakfast. "I don’t know," he says meekly, "but I definitely don’t want the f**ckin’ French toast " raped Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dabba Posted January 27, 2011 Report Share Posted January 27, 2011 senior citizens... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aftrunner Posted January 27, 2011 Report Share Posted January 27, 2011 Hehe. I like that answer sheet guy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ne0 Posted January 27, 2011 Report Share Posted January 27, 2011 ------------- rich man and a poor man were sitting at a bar having a few drinks and they got chatting. after a while they realise both of there wedding anniverserys are the next day. Poor man, "What did you get your wife for her wedding anniversery?" Rich man, "I got her a pink ferrari and a diamond ring." Poor man, "What made you choose those gifts?" Rich man, "She loves fast cars and I wasnt sure about the ring so if she doesnt like it, she can take it back in her new car... " The poor, "Man nodds in agreement." Rich man, "What did you get your wife?" Poor man, "I got my wife a pair of cheap slippers and a dildo." Rich man, "Why did you choose those gifts?" Poor man, " Well if she doesnt like the slippers she can go f*uck herself." lol....good one Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
killzone123 Posted January 27, 2011 Report Share Posted January 27, 2011 A guy was standing in a bar when a stranger walks in. After a while they get to talking and at about 10:30 PM the second guy says, "Oh well,I better get home.My wife doesn't like me to stay out during late night." The first guy replies, "I'll help you out of this. Just do what I say. Go home. Sneak into the bedroom. Pull back the covers. Get down between her legs then lick, lick and lick for about 20 minutes and there will be no complaints in the morning." The guy agrees to try that and continues drinking with him for two more hours before heading home to give it a try. When he got home, the house was pitch black. He sneaks upstairs into the bedroom, pulled back the covers and proceeded to lick for 20 minutes. The bed was like a swamp so he decided to wash his face. As he walked into the bathroom, his wife was sitting on the toilet. Seeing her he screamed, "What the hell are you doing in here?!" "Quiet!", she exclaimed. "You'll wake my mother." ---------------- A monkey goes into a bar and asks the barman: - Do you have any bananas? - No,I don't. ( says the barman) - Do you have any bananas? (asks the monkey) - No,I have not got any bananas!!! - Do you have any bananas? - If you ask me that question one more time, I'll nail your tongue to the counter!!! - Do you have any nails? - No,I don't. - Do you have any bananas? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rosh Posted January 27, 2011 Report Share Posted January 27, 2011 ^^ the 1st one was nice obaid bhai Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sackboy Posted January 27, 2011 Report Share Posted January 27, 2011 Lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
killzone123 Posted January 27, 2011 Report Share Posted January 27, 2011 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CM Sunny Posted January 27, 2011 Report Share Posted January 27, 2011 you can join us now 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
megzworld Posted January 28, 2011 Report Share Posted January 28, 2011 I love Bollywood.. Here are some of the Hindi Film made in 70s -80s Must Have's 1.Two brothers separated in childhood will always grow up on different sides of the law. The law-breaker, however, will suddenly turn over a new leaf before the end, bash up the villain (who is the *real* bad guy), and be pardoned for all his sins before the last-scene family reunion. (This is possible only if he has a heroine - see rule 2 below). 2. If the number of heroes is not equal to the number of heroines, the excess heroes/heroines will a) die b ) join the Red Cross and take off to Switzerland before the end of the movie. 3. If there are 2 heroes in a movie, they will fight each other savagely for at least 5 minutes (10 if they are brothers). 4. Any court scene will have the dialogue "Objection milord". If it is said by the hero, or his lawyer, it will be overruled. Else, it will be sustained. 5.The hero's sister will usually marry the hero's best friend ( i.e. the second hero). Else, she will be raped by the villain within the 1st 30 minutes, and commit suicide. 6. In a chase, the hero will always overtake the villain, even on a bullock-cart, or on foot. 7. When the hero fires at the villain(s), he will never a) miss b ) run out of bullets. When the villain fires at the hero, he will always miss (unless the hero is required to die, as in rule 2). 8. Any fight sequence shall take place in the vicinity of a stack of a) pots b ) barrels c) glass bottles, which will be smashed to pieces. 9. Any movie involving lost and found brothers will have a song sung by a) the brothers b ) their blind mother (but of course, she has to be blind in order to regain her sight in the climax) c) the family dog/cat. 10. Police inspectors (when not played by the hero) come in two categories: a) Scrupulously honest, probably the hero's father - killedby the villain before the titles. b ) Honest, but always chasing the anti-hero (as in Rule 1), saying "Tum kanoon se bach nahin sakte", only to pat him in the back in reel 23. Usually, this inspector's daughter is in love with the anti-hero. c) The corrupt inspector, (usually the real villain's sidekick) unceremoniously knocked about by the hero(s) in the climax. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sugat S Posted January 28, 2011 Report Share Posted January 28, 2011 @killzone123 repped. The first pic gave me a shock. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Django_3101 Posted January 28, 2011 Report Share Posted January 28, 2011 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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