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Jokes and Funny Stuff Thread


Chaztin
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Thanks, I knew that. Just that since Apple can flip the check switch on anytime, so it's always better to install on a registered device. Anyway, I guess it's not worth it for now.

 

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=idiot

 

 

:rofl: Read 1st, 2nd and 4th. 4th one is too much :lol: Who the f**k is Venkatachalam Ramakrishnan

 

I have always maintained that there is no substitute for that word in any language. It is one uniquely awesome word, and can almost replace 'f**k' for Indians in a lot of situations :P

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A Negro baby Boy is gifted a pair of wings by GOD...

 

He smiles asks

 

"Does It mean I'm an angel now?"

 

 

 

GOD laughed,

 

Arey Nahi re Kaalu...

 

Batman banaya tereko...

 

Sent from my GT-I9300 using Tapatalk 4 Beta

 

 

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Potey ki shakal dekh kar Saas apni bahhu se boli, "Iski shakal mere bete se kyu nahi milti?"

 

Bahu ne gusse main apni saaree oopar ki aur cheekhi,

 

"YEH CHOOT HAI BUDDHI, CHOOT!!! 12 MEGAPIXEL KA CAMERA NAHI HAI JO TERE LAUNDE KI PHOTO KHEENCH LE!"

 

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After every flight, QANTAS pilots fill out a form, known as a 'gripe sheet' to tell mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics fix the problem, and then document their repairs on the form.

 

Here are some actual maintenance problems submitted by the pilots (marked with a 'P') and the solutions recorded (marked by an 'S') by maintenance engineers, who by the way have a sense of humour:

 

P: Left inside main tyre almost needs replacement.

S: Left inside main tyre almost replaced.

 

P: Test flight OK, auto-land very rough.

S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

 

P: Something loose in cockpit.

S: Something tightened in cockpit.

 

P: Dead bugs on windshield.

S: Live bugs on back order.

 

P: Auto pilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.

S: Can't reproduce problem on the ground.

 

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.

S: Evidence removed.

 

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.

S: DME volume set to more believable level.

 

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.

S: That's what friction locks are for.

 

P: IFF inoperative in OFF mode.

S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

 

P: Suspect crack in windshield.

S: Suspect you're right.

 

P: Number 3 engine missing.

S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

 

P: Aircraft handles funny.

S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right and be serious.

 

P: Target radar hums.

S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

 

P: Mouse in cockpit.

S: Cat installed in cockpit.

 

P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.

S: Took hammer away from midget.

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