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If you think education is expensive--try ignorance -- Derek Bok, president of Harvard University

 

In the first place, God made idiots. This was for practice. Then he made school boards.--Mark Twain

 

A bad cold wouldn't be so annoying if it weren't for the advice of our friends.--Kin Hubbard

 

A human being is a computer's way of making another computer. Yes, we are their sex organs.--Solomon Short (aka David Gerrold, US science-fiction author)

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Some good bumper stickers

 

Alcohol and calculus don't mix: don't drink & derive!

 

Cover me, I'm changing lanes.

 

Don't drink and drive--if you hit a bump you spill your beer

 

Don't touch me...I'm not that kind of car.

 

Get a new car for your spouse--it's a great trade.

 

Honk if you love honking.

 

Hug your kids at home--belt them in the car!

 

I don't drive fast, I fly low!

 

I might be slow but I'm ahead of you.

 

If everything is coming your way, then you're in the wrong lane.

 

If you don't like my driving, then GET OFF the sidewalk.

 

Look out! I drive like you!

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The only medicine for suffering, crime, and all the other woes of mankind, is wisdom.

Thomas Huxley

 

A wise man learns by the mistakes of others,

a fool by his own.

Latin Proverb

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a few more wisecracks....

 

A girl can wait for the right man to come along but in the meantime that still doesn't mean she can't have a wonderful time with all the wrong ones

 

A man with an erection is in no need of advice

 

As she lay there dozing next to me, one voice inside my head kept saying, "Relax...you are not the first doctor to sleep with one of his patients," but another kept reminding me, 'Howard, you are a veterinarian"

 

Better that a girl has beauty than brains because boys see better than they think

 

I learned about sex the hard way--from books!

 

I think men talk to women so they can sleep with them and women sleep with men so they can talk to them

 

I'd rather have two girls at seventeen than one at thirty-four

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"It Had To Happen" - Carmine, Gears of War

 

He yells that whenever the player he gets a headshot

 

 

just love it :P , the main reason as to why my preferred cog is Carmine

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a few more wisecracks....

 

A man with an erection is in no need of advice

 

As she lay there dozing next to me, one voice inside my head kept saying, "Relax...you are not the first doctor to sleep with one of his patients," but another kept reminding me, 'Howard, you are a veterinarian"

 

I learned about sex the hard way--from books!

 

I think men talk to women so they can sleep with them and women sleep with men so they can talk to them

 

I'd rather have two girls at seventeen than one at thirty-four

 

:roflroll2:

 

The last one is the ultimate one :P !

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"Don't mind if i do" - Marcus fenix.

This phrase is best when used while -

1) stealing some1 else kill.

2) getting a weapon which was an apple of some1 else eyes.

3) after winning a match when the opposition rant that they r superior.

4) last but not the least, when u chainsaw some1.

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>Is sex dirty? Only if it's done right

 

>Nature abhors a virgin--a frozen asset

 

>Nothing beats making love. It's the most fun you can have without laughing.

 

>Women need a reason to have sex--men just need a place

 

>Don't knock masturbation. It's sex with someone I love

 

>We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation.

 

>Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.

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GTA VC inversion therapy ad on one of the radio stations in the game :

 

"I used to be terrified of my kids getting hurt, so i stabbed them, it didnt hurt them that bad"

 

A real Classic. !!

 

Man, I really hope GTA4 has some goodies like these on the radio. San Andreas radio chatter was disappointing.

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yeah, both vcpr and kchat in gta vc rocked. Although i liked vcpr better :thumbsup: ! Many times i just turned on the VCPR station and kept roaming around enjoying the chatter.

 

Hope they get back Laslow and maurice chavez back in GTA 4 :majesty: !

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>“We can learn much from wise words, little from wisecracks, and less from wise guys”

 

> The secret of success is sincerity. Once you can fake that you've got it made.

 

> He always makes people laugh, especially when he leaves the room.

 

> I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message...

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