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Things Games Have Taught You

Davis Nayagam

By Davis Nayagam,
in General Chatter

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Davis Nayagam Newbie

Davis Nayagam

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We've all played hundreds of games, but what have they taught us about real life?

 

Be it rules of physics, laws of life, whatever, what lessons have you learned from games?

 

Post the game you learned it from, too.

 

1. When you're about to beat someone in a fight, they will rapidly flash between red and their normal skin tone.

2. Chickens are easy to pick up.

3. Tennis is really easy.

4. Hockey is almost entirely about checking and fist-fights.

5. Most people don't say anything of interest.

6. On any given day, a 16-year old girl can beat up a gigantic bear, or an old man can beat up a robot.

7. The best way to open a container is to destroy it.

8. When you enter a town, the person closest to the entrance will welcome you to the town and tell you its name.

9. When driving, a full 360 flip is routine, provided you land wheels down.

10. Pay attention to shiny things.

11. All ninjas will try to kill you on sight. Unless said ninja is a super badass ninja who refuses to talk. That guy will run away after saying "..." But beware--he'll be back.

12. Parachutes are standard issue for all soldiers, regardless of what they're tasked with on the Battlefield.

13. Food heals all wounds.

14. Eating typically takes one or two seconds, and can usually be accomplished by standing on top of food.

15. If you run out of bullets, you die.

16. Everyone, everywhere, at anytime is capable of jumping at least 5 feet straight up.

17. Eating mushrooms can make you grow taller. Eating flowers let you shoot fireballs out of your hand.

18. Female martial artists are either little girls in Japanese school clothes, or scantily clad vixens with ginormous boobies.

19. The Web was basically built for people to play puzzle games and tower defense.

20. Windows sucks.

21. Your thumb is your most powerful weapon.

22. Pokemon, though vicious fighting animals, will only attack other Pokemon. Even the biggest, nastiest Pokemon won't hurt a human.

23. Princess Peach really needs a security staff.

24. And so does Princess Zelda.

25. Most people don't mind if you wander into their house unannounced. They also don't care if you go rifling through their chests and barrels looking for items.

26. A large number of doors and gates are controlled by elaborate pulley systems involving statues and clay tablets.

27. Barrels with radioactive signs on the side will explode if shot.

28. Hemorrhaging head wounds can be healed by standing on top of any box with the red cross symbol on the side.

29. Bad guys and monsters tend to enjoy carrying around the same types of bullets your guns use, even if they themselves are not armed.

30. Big a*s boobs are great. 3D big a*s boobs with a proper physics engine behind them are even better.

31. Massive boobs do not, in anyway, interfere with physical and athletic performance.

32. Most cities, though appearing large, are composed of small alleys and single streets blocked off at both ends by garbage, fences, cars, or mysterious invisible barriers.

33. 90% of all doors are completely fake. They're just painted onto the wall.

34. Solid Snake's co-workers are completely incapable of shutting the f**k up.

35. Turtles come out of their shells if you press down hard on them. Additionally, turtle shells are really slick on the bottom, and thus they slide around on normal surfaces as though they were ice.

36. For the most part, jumping on something's head will kill it. If it does not, then throwing a dead animal at the thing will do the job.

37. All adventures will take the protagonist through an "ice world."

38. If you get poisoned, you won't die as long as you stay still.

40. Grenades are easy to locate in major metropolitan areas. And in fields. And in suburbs. And in airbases. And in hotels. And on the bus. And in schools. But if you find grenades in a military base, they're probably fake and don't really exist.

41. 95% of all computers, desks, tables and chairs are exactly the same.

42. Killing people makes you stronger.

43. When someone dies, their body will decompose within 5 minutes of death.

44. Dead people, after decomposition, tend to leave behind weapons, food, or keys.

45. Bad guys like to build elaborate mazes around their headquarters.

46. The head guy involved in anything is usually trying to destroy the world.

47. Bad guy managers are usually far stronger than any of their underlings.

48. If a bad guy is really really big, you'll have to flip a number of switches in order to damage him. These switches will always reset within 30 seconds of being hit, making Mr. Big Baddy invulnerable again.

49. The more you kill, the better the stuff you get.

50. All store owners will buy any old crap you have in your bag, no matter how much of it you own.

51. If in combat, your enemies will usually stand around and wait patiently as you go through your rucksack looking for your rocket launcher.

52. A knife in the back beats three bullets in the face.

53. When you go to bed at an inn, a 3-second jingle will play before you go to sleep..

54. Hedgehogs do not have blood flowing through their veins, but giant gold rings.

55. The greatest of warriors often communicates in childish aphorisms.

56. Clothing only comes in one size.

57. If you come across a locked door, you have to find the key, even if it's a brittle piece of wood that a grenade should be able to obliterate.

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Somebody Newbie

Somebody

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did u compile that whole list davis ???

 

anyway, wow, nice list... and as someone already posted, looks like ur working in HR on IndianVideoGamer :boxing:

 

 

 

crashing head-on with any object in a very fast moving car can cause u no damage if u change a few minor settings :sign_omg:

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lithuvien Contributor

lithuvien

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When the boss is down to 5% of his HP, he will unleash a devastating spell that will kill you.

 

You can't beat a game without a strategy guide

 

Playing for more than 5 hours straight will have you dreaming that you too, can cast Blizaga.

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sandy160687 Newbie

sandy160687

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Things to be learnt from gears of war:-

 

 

 

 

1. Always duck in cover.

 

2. Never be caught without your chainsaw.

 

3. Look before you leap... or shoot.

 

4. You run faster when you're low to the ground.

 

5. Always help your buddies up.

 

6. Don't hang around corpses too long.

 

7. Satellite-based electronics never work when you need them to.

 

8. If she's more than 8 feet tall, just walk away.

 

9. When a Berserker busts through some indestructible boxes at the back of the train, make sure to do the exact opposite of the suggested path and instead lure her off the back of the train, then notice the secret cereal boxes.

 

10. On that note, buy lots of cereal- YOU COULD WIN A TINY PILLOW!

 

11. When in doubt, trust the guy with the Du-Rag.

 

12. Splitting up is a bad idea. f**k that Scooby Doo sh*t.

 

13. "Lambent" means they glow in the dark.

 

14. Multitasking is an essential skill when driving.

 

15. Not everyone is a qualified sniper.

 

16. Capes are a good indicator of combat prowess.

 

17. If you can't see his face, he's probably not important.

 

18. A couch is a poor substitute for a wall.

 

19. On that note, there are some times when "chillin' on the couch" simply is not appropriate.

 

20. The bugs that flock to you when you're carrying a flashlight are much better than the ones that flock to you when you don't.

 

21. You get more bars outside.

 

22. Demonstrations of combat prowess are a great way to earn people's respect.

 

23. For all the diversity in the world, everyone basically uses the same stuff.

 

24. Fossil fuel is combustible.

 

25. Never underestimate the combat abilities of the homeless.

 

26. No matter how much you hate it, sometimes you're just going to have to get out and push the car.

 

27. Sticky things are always better up close and personal.

 

28. If you haven't got the skills to do something facy it's best just to do it the regular way.

 

29. You know, there IS a gun attached to that chainsaw. You CAN shoot them too.

 

30. Don't bring a knife to a gun fight. Pistols will work, though.

 

31. Three is company. Four is kickass.

 

32. It's important to make sure the floors of your residence have proper insulation and structural support. You never know what's below them.

 

33. A rain poncho does not qualify as proper body armor.

 

34. Mine carts are NOT an amusement ride.

 

35. Unattended bling should be pocketed.

 

36. To reduce CO2 emissions, curb stomp instead of shooting execution-style.

 

37. Avoid intersections. Bad stuff just happens there.

 

38. If your background music suddenly turns suspenseful, get yo a*s in gear.

 

39. Chainsaws are very democratic. They don't discriminate based on race, gender, religion, or even species.

 

40. Why open the desk drawers when you can just saw the thing in half?

 

got it from a group on facebook.

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