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Heart broken ppl's club


Ne0
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  • 2 weeks later...

So there's a guy who constantly keeps talking to my gf on phone for 3-4hours or more. It gets me frustrated. But I don't say it. He tries to flirt with my gf by saying "Love you and sh*t like this".(How do I know this? My gf told me) That guy is like 6years (or more) older than her. When I ask my gf "How do you feel when he says something like that?" My gf says "Nothing. Idc" Then I say "Why do you even bother to talk?" She says "He's very caring and sh*t like this..." I asked my gf "Why don't you stop him to say something like this?" My gf says "I did once but he's like he just wants to says his things doesn't want to listen anyone". I told my gf "What kind of f** he is like wtf"? He tries to over protect my gf. He tries to restrict my gf by saying "don't do this ; don't do that"(He basically tries to boss my gf) which I never do coz it's lame. I let her live the way she wants to. My gf says "He's insecured. Also , indirectly he wants us (me and my gf) to be separated to that guy can be with her." I asked her "why do you talk to him" she just says "He's my friend. And he's senior. I can't stop talking to any friend like that all of a sudden and he's very caring" (I just hate caring word now). I guess she had point. A lot of thing bothers me but I don't say it. :| My gf and that guy is just opposite. My gf likes to drink , smoke , going to club etc and that guy is against this. Few months ago my gf collaged a pic with him on his b'day. On that pic it's written "Best friend forever <3" And from what I know too much caring guys gets friendzoned (been there done that). So I don't know. It frustrates me a lot. But I never say anything to my gf about this thing. See I'm not narrow minded. She can talk to him but it bugs me coz the sh*t he says and my gf says "I just have to listen his crap he talks to much". I understand you can't say any of your friend to stop talking. So she just says "I listen his crap and don't give a sh*t"



P.S. Yes, I have other female friends whom I can talk to on phone for hours but I don't coz I pay attention to my gf more.



Edited by GameAnalyzer
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Tell your GF very calmly that you hate that guy and cant tolerate her wasting time with him. Also, frankly tell her that it makes you feel angry and makes you want to punch that guy on face.

 

IMO your GF likes to keep him around. I cant say why as I dont know the background, what does he do, how old are you guys etc etc.

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I'm 19. She's around my age. And that guy works at Airport (Check In - Out something) (I'm guessing his age must be above 24). That guy wants to be an IAS officer but all day he talks to my gf.

If I tell my gf that I don't like when you talk to him. Doesn't she will think I am getting insecured?

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If I tell my gf that I don't like when you talk to him. Doesn't she will think I am getting insecured?

 

Are you feeling insecure? If yes, then tell her that frankly. A little bit of possessiveness (especially against a guy who VERY CLEARLY has interest in your GF) is allowed in a relationship. Also tell her very calmly and nicely, not forcing or anything.

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It's just I don't understand why she talks to him. And yeah I will try to ask but Idk how do I ask her?

 

Girls are weird man. I dont see any reason why she should feel obliged to talk to him unless he did her a huge favour and she doesnt want to sound rude. But 3-4 hrs per day is freaking unbelievable.

 

Any others here who had this experience before/know such cases?

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You are feeling insecure.

 

 

 

It's just I don't understand why she talks to him

 

That's just stupid. Just because she is your girlfriend, doesn't mean you own her. She has right to spend her time & life. She thinks him as a friend and talks, I don't know why are you getting mad. If your relationship is true, you shouldn't worry about her talking to other guys.

(you should do the same. Try talking to girls and see how she feels. If she gets frustrated, you can start the topic about her talking to other guys and solve the issue)

 

And, forcing her to stop talking to that guy will only make a bad impression of you in her mind. Eventually, you'll lose her.

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You are feeling insecure.

 

 

 

 

That's just stupid. Just because she is your girlfriend, doesn't mean you own her. She has right to spend her time & life. She thinks him as a friend and talks, I don't know why are you getting mad. If your relationship is true, you shouldn't worry about her talking to other guys.

(you should do the same. Try talking to girls and see how she feels. If she gets frustrated, you can start the topic about her talking to other guys and solve the issue)

 

And, forcing her to stop talking to that guy will only make a bad impression of you in her mind. Eventually, you'll lose her.

 

He has every right to object, he doesn't own her but a relationship is like a contract that requires some amount of faithfulness and some boundaries. He can't force her to stop but he HAS to object if he feels those boundaries are being violated.

 

He should tell her straight up if he doesn't appreciate it. Even girls appreciate possessiveness . Don't ask her to stop completely just ask her to limit it a bit.

 

And IMO, no relationship is "true", every relationship has an event that can push it over the edge.

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GA dude dont take it the wrong way as what im about to ask is very vague and general and in no way directed at you but do people even have serious relationships at such a young age? o_O

Because most girls I've come across by the time they are my age 24-25 are only interested in rich successful dudes and all this concept of love, etc is BS to them!

And no I'm not just saying that because some girl treated me that way or some sh*t. :P its because most of my girl/ friends(not girlfriend) have this general mentality where they want to marry a rich guy with a mercedes and dough to blow as soon as possible. And these girls actually belong to well off families (not extremely rich but swift desire honda city rich) :P

Edited by playstationdude
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Well if my girl spoke to a guy for 3 hours a day on a phone who said 'love you' n sh*t to her, and told her not to drink n smoke etc, I'd probably go and cave his skull in, insecurities be damned. But I haven't been in a real relationship (something that didn't involve monetary transaction) for more than two decades, so don't take my advise.

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Insecure or not, this is not gonna end the right way. The minute you and your gf have a fight guess who's gonna be there to "care" for her? And even if its a pretty small fight he'll be telling her that you're too good for him, and he doesn't deserve you etc. And bam, he males a move.

Girls are fickle. They don't need to be drunk to think like an idiot.

Be careful of this guy bro. Tell her you don't like this guy. If she listens, she's a keeper. If this becomes a fight, pray to god that this fight came as soon as possible, and not after things became more serious.

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