dylanjosh Posted January 13, 2022 Report Share Posted January 13, 2022 You need to cut her out. Delete her number from everywhere. Block her on social media.. Stop going to gym at the time she goes. (Or change gyms altogether). It sounds drastic but in the end it will be way better for your own mental health. 3 minutes ago, GunnerY2J said: Another main thing I can't stop talking to her is that she is a depressed person like me and many people (friends) have left me in the past because of it and I have deep and terrible separation anxiety. Nope. You can't afford to care about her like this. I'm sure she has friends who will help her through if anything. (It sounds like she would be fine). You're wasting too much mental bandwidth on her. Bandwidth you don't have. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GunnerY2J Posted January 13, 2022 Report Share Posted January 13, 2022 7 minutes ago, Joe Cool said: Time will eventually heal. It always does. Just give yourself more time and space. Stop wasting it on people who don't want you in their life or not looking to be your partner. This is completely normal and fine. You shouldn't be angry or blame yourself or her for not accepting you. Go out, spend time with something you like/enjoy doing it and don't think about her or look up your phone often. Family, friends or even some alone time. Meditate, exercise, take a cold shower, read, play, work, etc,. Just keep yourself busy and you will soon notice how less you will think of her. Eventually, it will fade. Can take weeks or months or even years. It all depends on how much you want to forget and move on. People can only give advice. You have to put it to work as only you are the one who is going to face it. Not me. Not others. Just you. Ask yourself how you will feel when you find she likes and is with someone else? Do you really want to wait for that and get more heartbroken? Also, stop thinking with a loser mentality. It is not the end of the world. Every second people get rejected. Better to get rejected than get accepted through pity and clinging and forcing someone into liking you. That's not even healthy and it will only make it worse in long run. I sometimes wants that she rejects me permanently. The last rejection should come from her and not me. Like the last f**k off. Instagram reels and youtube shorts and movie scenes are messing me even more. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GunnerY2J Posted January 13, 2022 Report Share Posted January 13, 2022 (edited) 11 minutes ago, dylanjosh said: You need to cut her out. Delete her number from everywhere. Block her on social media.. Stop going to gym at the time she goes. (Or change gyms altogether). It sounds drastic but in the end it will be way better for your own mental health. Nope. You can't afford to care about her like this. I'm sure she has friends who will help her through if anything. (It sounds like she would be fine). You're wasting too much mental bandwidth on her. Bandwidth you don't have. Gym boost is the only greatly healthy thing I am getting here and would like to continue with it. Yes, sometimes I feel I need her more than she needs me.(or only I need her, she doesn't) Edited January 13, 2022 by GunnerY2J Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted January 13, 2022 Report Share Posted January 13, 2022 3 minutes ago, GunnerY2J said: I sometimes wants that she rejects me permanently. The last rejection should come from her and not me. Like the last f**k off. Instagram reels and youtube shorts and movie scenes are messing me even more. That will only get you angry. You will get pissy, mad, do something stupid, then do what you were already doing daily. So you don't need her or anyone to say that to you so you can restart or continue doing what you are doing. She already rejected you. You are just "hoping coping" she won't reject again and accept instead of telling you to sod off. That's not worth it. Unrequited love sucks but it's not uncommon. Why do you want to stoop so low for someone who already rejected you? You don't have any self-esteem? Do you really think she will like you after seeing this kind of behaviour from you? Quote Another main thing I can't stop talking to her is that she is a depressed and an anxious person like me Who cares? She doesn't. So why are you wasting your time? Quote the last girl I was in love with for a decade, I had just messaged her that I love you ,either reply or block me. This is just toxic. Sorry but you need to fix yourself first. Get a grip. Stop wasting your and other people time. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ZooZoo Posted January 13, 2022 Report Share Posted January 13, 2022 13 minutes ago, GunnerY2J said: I sometimes wants that she rejects me permanently. The last rejection should come from her and not me. Like the last f**k off. Instagram reels and youtube shorts and movie scenes are messing me even more. Bhai nibba hai kya? Life is not instagram reels. Move on and save yourself from this mental torture. There are plenty of fish in the sea. It might seem hard now but you will laugh at looking back at yourself 1 years later 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GunnerY2J Posted January 13, 2022 Report Share Posted January 13, 2022 (edited) 6 minutes ago, Joe Cool said: That will only get you angry. You will get pissy, mad, do something stupid, then do what you were already doing daily. So you don't need her or anyone to say that to you so you can restart or continue doing what you are doing. She already rejected you. You are just "hoping coping" she won't reject again and accept instead of telling you to sod off. That's not worth it. Unrequited love sucks but it's not uncommon. Why do you want to stoop so low for someone who already rejected you? You don't have any self-esteem? Do you really think she will like you after seeing this kind of behaviour from you? Who cares? She doesn't. So why are you wasting your time? This is just toxic. Sorry but you need to fix yourself first. Get a grip. Stop wasting your and other people time. Yes, the first part is so true. That last part was stupid and that was when i was 17 but had to do that for mental peace. Because even then she was the one who made the many moves and i didn't, so I messaged her 3 years later, this was the exact message : i don't want to have any regret later that i didn't express my feelings, but I have always had feelings for you, Please reply, she didn't so I told her reply or block me. Edited January 13, 2022 by GunnerY2J Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GunnerY2J Posted January 13, 2022 Report Share Posted January 13, 2022 2 minutes ago, ZooZoo said: Bhai nibba hai kya? Life is not instagram reels. Move on and save yourself from this mental torture. There are plenty of fish in the sea. It might seem hard now but you will laugh at looking back at yourself 1 years later Will move on but Have decided though that not interested in other fish either. Btw, also lost interest in any explicit content ever since, no other girl/ woman interests me a bit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GunnerY2J Posted January 13, 2022 Report Share Posted January 13, 2022 9 minutes ago, Joe Cool said: Why do you want to stoop so low for someone who already rejected you? You don't have any self-esteem? Do you really think she will like you after seeing this kind of behaviour from you? This I felt a lot btw, thanks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KunjanPSD Posted January 13, 2022 Report Share Posted January 13, 2022 6 minutes ago, GunnerY2J said: she didn't so I told her reply or block me. Honestly, that's creepy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ZooZoo Posted January 13, 2022 Report Share Posted January 13, 2022 lemme give you a real example. I used to have this one friend who was a girl few years back. We connected a lot because of common interests (comics, games, movies etc). She was literally a female version of me but I was never physically or romantically attracted towards her. She was just another good friend like some guys are. I never showed any indications that I like her more than just a friend but still she fell for me and proposed me. I denied, told her I do not feel like that at all and apologized even though I did not made any mistake (any other guy might have played on to get laid). She seemed to take it well and we stayed friends for few months before she abruptly messaged me that she cannot continue being a friend and keep lying to her feelings and blocked me. We havent spoken since then and now she is engaged to a guy who I coached in our company You are THIS girl. You are unnecessarily going after someone who just behaved a bit nicely with you and expecting the same from her. Obviously she is not responding in the same manner as she doesnt feel the same and now you are feeling all heartbroken and all. Where is this any of her fault? You are just being unfair on the girl. This is just another one sided love. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GunnerY2J Posted January 13, 2022 Report Share Posted January 13, 2022 Just now, KunjanPSD said: Honestly, that's creepy. And why was she constantly staring at me all the time, that made me terribly uncomfortable, that wasn't creepy ? And plenty of other things as well. But I needed closure Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GunnerY2J Posted January 13, 2022 Report Share Posted January 13, 2022 (edited) 11 minutes ago, ZooZoo said: lemme give you a real example. I used to have this one friend who was a girl few years back. We connected a lot because of common interests (comics, games, movies etc). She was literally a female version of me but I was never physically or romantically attracted towards her. She was just another good friend like some guys are. I never showed any indications that I like her more than just a friend but still she fell for me and proposed me. I denied, told her I do not feel like that at all and apologized even though I did not made any mistake (any other guy might have played on to get laid). She seemed to take it well and we stayed friends for few months before she abruptly messaged me that she cannot continue being a friend and keep lying to her feelings and blocked me. We havent spoken since then and now she is engaged to a guy who I coached in our company You are THIS girl. You are unnecessarily going after someone who just behaved a bit nicely with you and expecting the same from her. Obviously she is not responding in the same manner as she doesnt feel the same and now you are feeling all heartbroken and all. Where is this any of her fault? You are just being unfair on the girl. This is just another one sided love. Yes, I'm being unfair on her. Never said it's her fault though. Just the thing of keep on pursuing if in love or let go. Letting go remains hard though. Did get a more broader perspective today though. Edited January 13, 2022 by GunnerY2J Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted January 13, 2022 Report Share Posted January 13, 2022 18 minutes ago, GunnerY2J said: And why was she constantly staring at me all the time, that made me terribly uncomfortable, that wasn't creepy ? And plenty of other things as well. But I needed closure You should have spoken up. Should have told her that she was making you uncomfortable? Just because she did this doesn't mean you should do it as well. You can do better. Closure is overrated nor anyone is entitled to it. What are you going to do after closure? You will get special powers? She already closed on you. You don't need further confirmation to continue with your life. If it helps just re-read all the replies you go and take it as your closure. People are just trying to help you but if you are not going to try then no point. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GunnerY2J Posted January 13, 2022 Report Share Posted January 13, 2022 (edited) 4 minutes ago, Joe Cool said: You should have spoken up. Should have told her that she was making you uncomfortable? Just because she did this doesn't mean you should do it as well. You can do better. Closure is overrated nor anyone is entitled to it. What are you going to do after closure? You will get special powers? She already closed on you. You don't need further confirmation to continue with your life. If it helps just re-read all the replies you go and take it as your closure. People are just trying to help you but if you are not going to try then no point. You can't expect someone to read and just instantly transform as an individual. That would be fake, I have my flaws which I accept and trying to understand all the messages and did get plenty of new perspective today. Everyone's not as strong, some do need closure though. And that's like around majority people want some kind of closure. Edited January 13, 2022 by GunnerY2J Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GunnerY2J Posted January 13, 2022 Report Share Posted January 13, 2022 All in all, I will stop pursuing the girl, would stop expecting and try to stop overthinking her end, Some of the messages I felt, some others I felt as well but can't follow. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted January 13, 2022 Report Share Posted January 13, 2022 4 minutes ago, GunnerY2J said: You can't expect someone to read and just instantly transform as an individual. That would be fake, I have my flaws which j accept and trying to understand all the messages and did get plenty of new perspective today. Nobody said you need to instantly transform. Nobody does it either. This will set you back for a good amount of weeks or months or even years. It totally depends on you how long you want to waste your time. Learning and experiencing things is part of life and not everything is going to sweet or go in your way. You just have to live with it. Years later you will still remember her but you won't be sad (maybe a little but only for a moment) but you will smile it off and be glad about it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dylanjosh Posted January 13, 2022 Report Share Posted January 13, 2022 On 1/12/2022 at 6:25 PM, GunnerY2J said: any chance of this thread reaching her :p Give me her number, I'll link her here Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snake Posted January 13, 2022 Report Share Posted January 13, 2022 3 minutes ago, dylanjosh said: Give me her number, I'll link her here Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ZooZoo Posted January 13, 2022 Report Share Posted January 13, 2022 Dude, girls do this often. Reality of life is that they have dozens of options, they flirt around and then pick one and ghost everyone else. If you are in doubt, ask any of your female friends to show you their instagram or facebook message requests. It will be an eye opener. I saw it once when my gf showed it to me jokingly and since then I keep her on a pedestal. If a girl is ignoring all other guys that are pinging constantly, you need to tolerate all of their tantrums. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SRINI87 Posted January 13, 2022 Report Share Posted January 13, 2022 (edited) Yeah u can't immediately stop. I have reduced texting now gunnerj is in worse position than me. Edited January 13, 2022 by SRINI87 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.