Cash Posted July 19, 2011 Report Share Posted July 19, 2011 (edited) light the beedi..and show him how a man smokes his stuff I dont want to get some noobs into this. To each his own. I still remember once he asked why doesn't the cigs give me any kick or anything and i just replied "Maybe you are pro at it that it feels nothing now for you." Edit - PS - Real men smoke Beedis/Cigars. Edited July 19, 2011 by Unknown. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
praveer Posted July 19, 2011 Report Share Posted July 19, 2011 (edited) While not actually heartbreak, I figured that since there isn't a 'dating-relationship' thread like the one at Gaf http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=414419 So I have this friend of mine and I have completely fallen for her, I 'know' she likes me and atleast has a soft corner for me no matter how small but there are two problems: 1) I just can't gather enough courage to tell her that I like her. 2) When I do....something happens which makes her emotions take a U-turn, at this stage she's like ignoring everything and lost in her own thoughts. Today I told myself that I'm gonna tell her no matter what, so I met her today and as soon as I saw her I knew this was one of those bad days. I immediately guessed that this was something to do with her results, so I say hi and she's like 'uhh...yeah? Hi' *moves on* (I don't really like it when she does that but I guess everyone needs some space), fast forward few minutes and I am leaving the building and I see her sitting at the lounge waiting for someone (this is most probably me as there was literally no one inside the building who knew her) but neither of us looked at each other and I decided to move on. Moments later I am 40-50 meters away from the building and I hear footsteps of someone running towards me, I take a look and to my surprise its none other than her, she tells me that she's sorry for her past behavior and how she sort of ignored me before and I'm like "yea , its alright I guess" (I take a breather thinking 'well atleast she cares'), and then I go on to blame my flu for my sad/mellow/confused expression throughout the whole event. She tells me how the bad results completely messed up her plans (as apparently its one of her stronger modules) and she can't see how she's gonna cover up with her other modules which she doesn't even understands much and on top of that she has an IELTS test coming up and she hasn't prepared anything (IELTS maybe piss easy for us, but for someone who did their education in a different language than English.....its quite hard). I tried to console her by telling her that what's done is done and asked her to cheer up as she can do nothing about the past but can do a lot for the future. At this point I just wanted to give her a hug and consolidate her but for some reason I thought that wasn't the right thing to do and I decided to go according to my instinct. The problem here is I don't know what to do in this situation since I've never been emotionally attached to a woman this much, the best I can do is console her and maybe suggest some stuff but I can't help her with studies even if I want to since I'm not a med student, and then there are my own emotions and feelings (about me wanting to just let her know somehow that I like her) which clash with my thinking and thoughts every freakin day, which of course is foolish but I can't help it as I think I may have already delayed it for far too long. Conclusion: I just don't know what to do in this situation or how to even find a solution that helps both mine and her situation. I just want to help her in some way cause I love this woman so God damn much ! The girl is from Iran, some of you may remember me mentioning her once before on IVG, those who do will also remember I once talked about a Kuwaiti as well, well I stopped trying to get along with her as she was so stuck up and snobby (what's with women with amazing body/looks having attitude problems?). Edited July 19, 2011 by praveer Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
★ Kani ★ Posted July 19, 2011 Report Share Posted July 19, 2011 delete this thread already Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
godspeed4476 Posted July 19, 2011 Report Share Posted July 19, 2011 delete this thread already lol wut? why take away all the fun Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pushy Posted July 19, 2011 Report Share Posted July 19, 2011 praveer , Iran girl :wOOtjumpy: baby, just take some time men, just get along with her few times, don't let her go can't suggest much coz never been into relationship, so Agony Aunt should be ur mascot here B) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bird Bird Bird Posted July 19, 2011 Report Share Posted July 19, 2011 TBH, you should have just hugged her. Hugging DOES NOT mean love and sex. We hug our friends all the time (be it girls or boys, albeit in different manners), so in case she was depressed, a close physical interaction (i.e. a hug) is much much better than simple words. A touch always means more than words. Since life is not a holly/bolly movie, real life romancing is complicated. You have to be around, but not too around. Then the obvious, keeping her happy, jovial, having an OK sense of humor (don't be a wisecrack) etcetera etcetera. Help her out in the daily tidbits of life since your streams are different, but do not make her dependent on you. Obviously you can help her with the IELTS part, so whiz it out. And your little stint where she avoids you and then you avoid her gives a feeling that you both aren't really that close. Get to know her better. Make her know you better. It's tough when you 1st begin liking a person and then try to know him/her. So try getting your feelings out of the way and be better friends. That's the golden rule. Trust me, the fun part is knowing the other person. There's always be a little bit of something in her that will surprise you and vice-versa. Proposing/Saying your feelings is the easiest thing. Try not getting your inhibitions and egos in between. Seriously, don't inhibit yourself in expressing your feeling, just don't be a fool ! Wait for the right time and do it in proper manner. And never ever lose your individuality. 0.02$ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
praveer Posted July 19, 2011 Report Share Posted July 19, 2011 TBH, you should have just hugged her. Hugging DOES NOT mean love and sex. We hug our friends all the time (be it girls or boys, albeit in different manners), so in case she was depressed, a close physical interaction (i.e. a hug) is much much better than simple words. A touch always means more than words. I know that, and its not that I haven't hugged or caressed her her before...but as I said for some the very first thought that came into my mind was 'This isn't right' and I followed it without thinking. And your little stint where she avoids you and then you avoid her gives a feeling that you both aren't really that close. Get to know her better. This is actually correct but at the same time its just as incorrect. We ARE close to each other, I'm quite possibly her closest 'Guy friend' as far as intimacy goes, but we don't really talk all that much since both of us are very shy as far as personality goes, this is quite troublesome as we both expect the other one to make a move and since I'm the man here its mostly me who does that, but when we do talk to each other for long durations its a lot more personal than what you'd normally expect. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bird Bird Bird Posted July 19, 2011 Report Share Posted July 19, 2011 (edited) ^^ Time to get over your shyness. It's magical once you do that ! Plus you both talk and that's a good sign. Talk and talk more. Be the bestest of friends. Edited July 19, 2011 by F@tm@n Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
godspeed4476 Posted July 19, 2011 Report Share Posted July 19, 2011 TBH, you should have just hugged her. Hugging DOES NOT mean love and sex. We hug our friends all the time (be it girls or boys, albeit in different manners), so in case she was depressed, a close physical interaction (i.e. a hug) is much much better than simple words. A touch always means more than words. Since life is not a holly/bolly movie, real life romancing is complicated. You have to be around, but not too around. Then the obvious, keeping her happy, jovial, having an OK sense of humor (don't be a wisecrack) etcetera etcetera. Help her out in the daily tidbits of life since your streams are different, but do not make her dependent on you. Obviously you can help her with the IELTS part, so whiz it out. And your little stint where she avoids you and then you avoid her gives a feeling that you both aren't really that close. Get to know her better. Make her know you better. It's tough when you 1st begin liking a person and then try to know him/her. So try getting your feelings out of the way and be better friends. That's the golden rule. Trust me, the fun part is knowing the other person. There's always be a little bit of something in her that will surprise you and vice-versa. Proposing/Saying your feelings is the easiest thing. Try not getting your inhibitions and egos in between. Seriously, don't inhibit yourself in expressing your feeling, just don't be a fool ! Wait for the right time and do it in proper manner. And never ever lose your individuality. 0.02$ Nicely summarized fatty, i have never quite understood why some of the guys go ahead and try to propose the girl without even being good friends with her, its like playing 'GF-BF' for the sake of it . if you are good friends with a guy/gal for some time, hang out often, got to social events together , then the proposal moment or the realization would come automatically for both of the people involved. proposing a girl and getting to know her later is quite lame of both the parties involved. Although i am bit skeptical about hugging a relatively a person from other culture, u never know how they may react esp if you are not close to them. When, my gf from Greece was sobbing in the university lounge for not being able to make up her studies, one of the guy from our class tried to have a little chat with her and tried to give her an awkard hug, she pushed him away in the lounge area in the full view of students over there, they must have thought he was the actual source of problem Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bird Bird Bird Posted July 19, 2011 Report Share Posted July 19, 2011 (edited) Nicely summarized fatty, i have never quite understood why some of the guys go ahead and try to propose the girl without even being good friends with her, its like playing 'GF-BF' for the sake of it . if you are good friends with a guy/gal for some time, hang out often, got to social events together , then the proposal moment or the realization would come automatically for both of the people involved. proposing a girl and getting to know her later is quite lame of both the parties involved. Although i am bit skeptical about hugging a relatively a person from other culture, u never know how they may react esp if you are not close to them. When, my gf from Greece was sobbing in the university lounge for not being able to make up her studies, one of the guy from our class tried to have a little chat with her and tried to give her an awkard hug, she pushed him away in the lounge area in the full view of students over there, they must have thought he was the actual source of problem @ the last part Well, you gotta think before you hug. In Praveer's case, they are friends, so a hug strengthens bonds. This reminds me of one of my lady colleague from the college days. She's an Indian by origin, but brought in West Indies & USA. And is liberal with the use of expletives like "f**k" "Bitch" etc. And with every word of hers, all the girls used to go "OOOOOOOO ! Kitni gandi ladki hai !" when actually she was probably the most kind hearted person on campus. It's amusing to see how people generalize things ! And yeah, you gotta be friends before you can profess your love. It's ok to like somebody and then try getting to know him/her, but stating you love a person just because he/she looks handsome/beautiful is totally immature (which is what happens most of the times ala love at first sight ). But again the experience comes with age, so you can't blame the younger gen. Edited July 19, 2011 by F@tm@n Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pushy Posted July 19, 2011 Report Share Posted July 19, 2011 mamu Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
godspeed4476 Posted July 19, 2011 Report Share Posted July 19, 2011 @ the last part Well, you gotta think before you hug. In Praveer's case, they are friends, so a hug strengthens bonds. This reminds me of one of my lady colleague from the college days. She's an Indian by origin, but brought in West Indies & USA. And is liberal with the use of expletives like "f**k" "Bitch" etc. And with every word of hers, all the girls used to go "OOOOOOOO ! Kitni gandi ladki hai !" when actually she was probably the most kind hearted person on campus. It's amusing to see how people generalize things ! And yeah, you gotta be friends before you can profess your love. It's ok to like somebody and then try getting to know him/her, but stating you love a person just because he/she looks handsome/beautiful is totally immature (which is what happens most of the times ala love at first sight ). But again the experience comes with age, so you can't blame the younger gen. nah, i was not referring to him at all, i was just saying in general. I am not interested in any particular guy's relationship with a gal, coz after a certain point you should become mature enough to understand the basic truths of relationship and some general things about women,IMO being honest and sincere without any ego in between, is the most basic thing to be in any relationship and will do far more better than any of the advice in this or any other thread. and yes you are right about the 'I love you' and 'I wanna be your frieaand" part, tried it many a times in 15-17 age, the scared and constipated look the girls used to give me was just priceless Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
godspeed4476 Posted July 19, 2011 Report Share Posted July 19, 2011 Megz is that you? +1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pushy Posted July 19, 2011 Report Share Posted July 19, 2011 holy moly Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
praveer Posted July 19, 2011 Report Share Posted July 19, 2011 (edited) If it helps I'll make few things clear. -I've known her for 7 months and know her well. -I'm not in my teenage. -Hugging and kissing on cheek is a tradition in Persian culture, though its uncommon for people from opposite sex to do so unless they are really close...but I guess its not an issue with me as she doesn't minds when I hug her or caress her hair. -I don't want to 'propose' het but rather tell her that I 'like' her and would like to date her but I know she has other priorities and I understand it and have got no problem if she wants to put those before anything else. For those who are unaware dating IS the part where you get to know each other and it comes before relationship...unlike in India where its mostly after. And since I already know her a lot I'll jave to spend a lot less time on this phase. Edited July 19, 2011 by praveer Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bird Bird Bird Posted July 19, 2011 Report Share Posted July 19, 2011 (edited) Megz is that you? Awwwww. So cute ! *Insert some random rant about Milo, Outsider & Dabba* @ Meg(z)a Man ! Edited July 19, 2011 by F@tm@n Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
godspeed4476 Posted July 19, 2011 Report Share Posted July 19, 2011 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bird Bird Bird Posted July 19, 2011 Report Share Posted July 19, 2011 *Complains to Killzone123 bhaiya ki Godspeed mujhe khuli nigaahon se chedtha hai* Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
godspeed4476 Posted July 19, 2011 Report Share Posted July 19, 2011 *Complains to Killzone123 bhaiya ki Godspeed mujhe khuli nigaahon se chedtha hai* Hi Megz, will you be my friennad Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bird Bird Bird Posted July 19, 2011 Report Share Posted July 19, 2011 Hmph ! I'm not fraaaands with peepul who make spelling errors ! *snooty nose* Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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