Noctis Posted August 13, 2011 Report Share Posted August 13, 2011 After all this, if she really cares for you then she'll reciprocate as well. But if she doesn't then the truth is that she does not care for you at all; don't kick yourself since its not your fault. Good advice above except for this last part. Just because someone cannot get into a relationship doesn't mean he/she doesn't care. Unfortunately we don't live in a society where all it needs is for the couple to like each other. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pixeljunkie Posted August 13, 2011 Report Share Posted August 13, 2011 Good advice above except for this last part. Just because someone cannot get into a relationship doesn't mean he/she doesn't care. Unfortunately we don't live in a society where all it needs is for the couple to like each other. What i meant was that she didn't want to committ to Praveer simply because she didn't have those feelings for him. You can't force someone to love you. Once Praveer gets his answer then it'll be easier for him to move on. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
praveer Posted August 13, 2011 Report Share Posted August 13, 2011 (edited) What i meant was that she didn't want to committ to Praveer simply because she didn't have those feelings for him. You can't force someone to love you. Did I tell you that she also said that she likes me? Go through the very first post made by me regarding this issue again. Edited August 13, 2011 by praveer Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Noctis Posted August 13, 2011 Report Share Posted August 13, 2011 What i meant was that she didn't want to committ to Praveer simply because she didn't have those feelings for him. You can't force someone to love you. My point is that even having feelings for him is not enough. You have to consider her family and social circumstances, particularly since she is from Iran. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rAgHaV Posted August 13, 2011 Report Share Posted August 13, 2011 Megz, can i have your number?Edit: don't need it now Just saw your age Women..:doh:Anyway bro, as u seem to take time to get attached to a girl, dont wait for that to happen before tryin to hook up with a girl then as drebin said. Speed up ur game,be reckless take risks. Waiting till u get quiet attached gonna leave u with the same feelin in case of refusal. So make it quick the sooner she refuses the better u'll feel as the attachement wont b there. And remember being a nice and matures dude doesnt always pay. U need to have that mix of nice and matured with pinches of badass and punk. U sound like someone goodhearted, therefore u may seek the best as soon as u get in a relation and fear the loss to a point where u just do anything to please the other end. Overcome that, say "f*ck you" when necessary and when u feel like it. +1, repped.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pixeljunkie Posted August 13, 2011 Report Share Posted August 13, 2011 (edited) Did I tell you that she also said that she likes me? Go through the very first post made by me regarding this issue again. Maybe she was being polite when she said she liked you? Maybe she didn't want to upset you when you confessed your feelings? Unlike us men, women see a big difference between liking someone and loving someone. P.S - Do not tell her that you're in love with her. It'll freak her out. Be firm/polite yet gentle when you tell her that you care for her and that you want her. Edited August 13, 2011 by pixeljunkie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
killzone123 Posted August 13, 2011 Report Share Posted August 13, 2011 it's even worse when it happens for the 3rd time in a row. I think it'll be like this forever (ie. My whole college life) and I won't be trying anymore cause I don't want to go through this for a fourth time. well people realize from the first time...so i guess very soon we may see you going for a fourth attempt also,once your wounds have healed and secondly going through all your posts,it strange that both of you never got into the gf/bf topic...because usually people when they are interested ,they try to find out if the other person is in some sort of relationship or not... and yea as someone said that maybe she just made that excuse that she has a bf to get you off the track...whatever ...and as pixel suggested about ignoring her etc...that will work 99% of the times,with girls...but there is another angle to it... if the girl does not have a bf,and you start giving her the cold shoulder,with time she may come back to you...but sometimes the girl may have a bf,still she may be somewhat attached to you,and who does not want someone who loves him/her,sort of ego booster...and when you start ignoring her..she may come back to you,but again that will be a mental and emotional headache for you...she will still be having her old bf..and not letting you go also..and that will only give you pain Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Noctis Posted August 13, 2011 Report Share Posted August 13, 2011 I don't deny that cause its fairly possible, infact has quite a high chance considering she is one of the few international students from the uni who lives here with her family (her uncle and aunt), I don't know them much but they seemed to be somewhat the conservative types. But guess what's done is done. Missed your edit, it sounds thats most likely it. Particularly if she is a Muslim. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
praveer Posted August 13, 2011 Report Share Posted August 13, 2011 (edited) Missed your edit, it sounds thats most likely it. Particularly if she is a Muslim. Well the thing is she's agnostic and doesn't believes in religion at all. Her family here may be liberal but I can't say the same for the ones back home, and its obvious that they are in contact with the ones here. Edited August 13, 2011 by praveer Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abhi90 Posted August 13, 2011 Report Share Posted August 13, 2011 why do people think so much about girls chloe and lara> all Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bird Bird Bird Posted August 13, 2011 Report Share Posted August 13, 2011 ^^ Look who's talking ! /Snicker snicker. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abhi90 Posted August 13, 2011 Report Share Posted August 13, 2011 ^^ Look who's talking ! /Snicker snicker. umm snickers Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
megzworld Posted August 13, 2011 Report Share Posted August 13, 2011 Praveer.. Hmm.. So it happened!! Congrats buddy. You atleast went to the woman you had feelings for and told her what you felt honestly. Awesome!! Hug yourself for that. So she likes you but doesn't love you. besides, she also has a boyfriend even though a long distance one.. Good the girl is honest too. She was nice with you. She never (as comes from your several posts) tried to be overtly lovey dover, sometimes she even ignored you when she was disturbed about her studies.. She treated you like a friend and I don't think she purposly hid her feeling to lead you on. The things with girls when they are in a Long Distance Relationship is that.. They are in LOVE with a guy who is not around. He is a voice on the phone, a face on skype but not really a person around to take her out on a weekend or come see her when she is unwell. So, she does need some friends. She has a life other than her LOVE Life. Again the boyfriend is like a person, she will eventually unite be, but insecurities are high as well, so many girls do not reveal it unless they are really close friends. This is not to lead or tempt but just to spare the details, they feel are none of other's business. I am sure she would have continues to be your friend, must have gone out with you, had fun and laugh and that's it, unless ofcourse she developed feeling for you, which didnt happen here. It happens. When we love there is no Guarantee that the other person will love us, as much, less or more. My advise. Don't take "Falling In Love" , " I want to be in a Relationship" like an agenda. It's perfectly fine to be single and ready to mingle and that is in no way, Forever Alone. Give your heart some healing time. Don't take "Pratigya" or vow to never fall in love because you will. Feel bad, Cry a bit for a chance that didnt materialise and then move on. Go out with your guy friends and have a blast.. Flirt around.. enjoy life, Heartbreak is only temporary. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bird Bird Bird Posted August 13, 2011 Report Share Posted August 13, 2011 umm snickers @Megz: Finally a sane reply from someone on this thread. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LagWarriorZergey Posted August 13, 2011 Report Share Posted August 13, 2011 (edited) Praveer.. Hmm.. So it happened!! Congrats buddy. You atleast went to the woman you had feelings for and told her what you felt honestly. Awesome!! Hug yourself for that. Edited August 13, 2011 by LagWarriorZergey 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarketTantrik Posted August 13, 2011 Report Share Posted August 13, 2011 Repped Zergey Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
megzworld Posted August 13, 2011 Report Share Posted August 13, 2011 Megz, can i have your number? Edit: don't need it now Just saw your age Kya Tum Mantally The Sick Ho My Bwoy? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LagWarriorZergey Posted August 13, 2011 Report Share Posted August 13, 2011 Megz, can i have your number? Edit: don't need it now Just saw your age Bro there r things u just dont play with when women are concerned.. one thing is their age. Agony is gonna b ur friend forever! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CM Sunny Posted August 13, 2011 Report Share Posted August 13, 2011 (edited) Kya Tum Mantally The Sick Ho My Bwoy? ooo I see them fangs Revenge of the female mamu 1: Age pay mat jaa Edited August 13, 2011 by Sunny The Shakuni Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
outsider Posted August 13, 2011 Report Share Posted August 13, 2011 Hi prav Good work on talking to her about the way you feel. It's a pity she doesn't reciprocate. Sometimes, it's just the way the cookie crumbles. I think you're taking the right approach in moving on. If you were to go down the pixel path, what you'd be doing is showing a marked disrespect for this girl, her relationship and her feelings. End result: Hello stalker, goodbye friendship. I think I said this to you earlier, but I'll say it again. As much as it may feel like "oh, why does this keep happening to me? I'm the nice guy, maybe I should stop being so nice," the reality (particularly here) is that it's a case of the wrong person at the wrong time. You mentioned earlier that you spend too long getting to know someone and get in too deep before you make a move. A number of people have suggested the scatter gun approach in response. As an approach, I don't think it's either good or bad. It all depends on how you operate. If you're someone that needs some sort of connection to feel the attraction (as opposed to "ooh, she's hot, I'd like to tap that or some such sentiment), then, stick with your current MO. Basically, do what feels right to you. Build your confidence in relating to people that you are attracted to. When that voice in your head tells you to shut up or be timid, shut it off, and just go by feeling and respond to your gut. You seem to have a fairly good underlying sense of judgment and responsiveness. Use it. For the moment, yes, you've really liked this girl, yes, it's hard to get over your feelings, yes, you'll be feeling dejected. Don't speculate about whether she's making up a boyfriend etc. It doesn't really make a difference to the ultimate question, and it's second guessing her, when she's clearly told you one thing. I say wrong person because given she is in a relationship, at this point in time, the person that she is, is the wrong person. If I were you, I wouldn't give up on relationships etc. on the back of this. Don't take the melodramatic approach to it, and build it up as a really big setback. It isn't, and if you do, the only thing you'll be doing is screwing yourself over. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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